Shame is a powerful and low-level vibration. It can incite another dangerous low-level vibration called depression. I believe Brene’ Brown said it best after her in-depth research saying that guilt is when you feel you did something wrong and shame is when you feel you ARE something wrong. Guilt is bad enough…feeling like we’ve done something wrong can be extremely detrimental unless looked at and dealt with. However, if we feel that there is something wrong with us…that takes it to a completely different level.
You see, when we feel there is something wrong with us (inherently or developed), that is when hope diminishes. If we feel there is something wrong with us, that’s basically implying that we’re broken and can’t be fixed. There is no hope for a better future or a different outcome because we are defective in some way, and where there is a lack of hope, depression settles in. Depression is dangerous because there is no drive to do things differently. Anger can push us to make change, so can jealousy, blame, frustration and other low vibrating energies…but depression gives up and that is dangerous. This is why shame and depression so often walk hand in hand.
So, what can we do when we notice shame within us? Go into it. We have to face it and most often get outside help. Not necessarily professional help (although that’s usually recommended) but some sort of help. Shame breeds in silence. We have to open up and discuss it with another. As long as it’s hidden…it’s shame. But shame doesn’t survive the light. So bring it to the light and work through it. I’m going to go to my favorite quote from ACIM yet again for this one: “Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Herein lies the peace of God.”. At your core, you are eternal, real, perfect, divine…you cannot be threatened. Nothing you did or experienced can damage You. What has been damaged is your mind-made self, your temporary emotional/mental state has been damaged. However, since that can be threatened, it’s not actually “real” in an eternal sense, it doesn’t technically exist on a soul-level. As you identify with the True You and disidentify with the mind-made you…herein lies the peace of God.
We all experience shame at one time or another and when it’s ours…we feel like our situation is different. We have to feel that way, otherwise it wouldn’t be shame. We have to feel that ours is on a different level and others wouldn’t understand or would never look at us the same. It’s an amazing feeling when this is shared with someone that is completely trustworthy. There’s a safe-space of non- judgement present and the shame cannot live or thrive in that space. It instantly diminishes and becomes easier to transcend. It may take a little work but it’s sooooo worth it! There is only so much happiness and peace we can experience walking around with shame inside, so at some point it’s necessary to the expansion and growth you’re trying to achieve. Find a safe person to help you and walk through this – you won’t regret it!!!